Sharp as Coleman’s Mustard

Jeremiah Colman was once asked to sum up the secret of his success and how he made a fortune out of such a humble thing as mustard. His reply was that he made his money from the mustard that people left on the sides of their plate. Now as a young child I was confused by this and had visions of Mr Coleman going round and scraping the remains off peoples’ plates and reselling it. Ah, bless.

Instead of wasting your leftover mustard here are some alternative uses:

For washing smelly dishes, add a heaped tablespoon of Colman’s with the soap to remove odours like fish and onions.

Make a paste with Colman’s and spread it on the back of a loose tile to secure it to the wall. Acts like plaster! (my Grandfather also told me the same about condensed milk)

Use as fertiliser for better coloured daffodils.

Sprinkle dry mustard inside shoes to prevent cold feet and frostbite.

Mustard and honey at bedtime for coughs, a pinch of mustard in a glass of water for hiccups.

Colman’s poultry mustard fed to chickens stimulates egg production.

To mend leaky car radiators temporarily, pour in contents of 2 oz tin of mustard while car is running.

Sprinkle over plants to rid them of insect pests.

Dry Colman’s rubbed into dog’s coat helps stop distemper. Cover dog with blanket.

Smear headlights with a dry Colman’s mixed with some water to drive in fog. Voilà, fog lights! (Not sure if that is legal on the continent)

Stuffy nose? Make a paste, spread it generously over a cracker, and take a few bites. This clears it up in seconds!

Do you have trouble with ants? Sprinkle Colman’s mustard over their trail and they won’t cross it.

Hands smell like onions or garlic? Rub some Colman’s on your hand and rinse with warm water to remove the smell.

When using breadcrumbs on chicken or chops, add a tablespoon of Colman’s to the breadcrumbs.

Before cooking mussels, put them in a bucket of water with a few teaspoonfuls of dry Colman’s to make them spit out the grit and sand.

Make a paste and rub it on the sole of the foot and around the ear lobes. This is very relaxing and reduces stress.

Use a thin mixture of Colman’s and water to catch worms for fishing. You have to find a wormhole, and pour the mixture in. The worms wiggle out and then you need to rinse them off before putting them in your bait box.